Surprise Witness
“First Mutual Insurance claims that the damage to my client’s home was an act of God, and thus not covered under his policy. I would like to ask: What do we mean by an ‘act of God,’ in this day and age? Does it refer to a specific god, or is it general?
“Syntax and capitalization are of key importance here. Note the absence of the indefinite article, as well as the capitalized initial ‘G.’ In a general survey of the entire history of literature in the English language, one will find that this construction has a very specific meaning – namely, it is used almost exclusively to refer to the Judeochristian Yaweh, and rarely, by association, the Muslim Allah. If the contract were written, ‘act of a god,’ or ‘act of gods,’ it would be a different case entirely; however, the contract clearly states–”
“Excuse me, sir, but how is this relevant?”
“I was about to get to that. I propose to prove, by a preponderance of evidence, that the storm which damaged my client’s home was not caused by either Yaweh or Allah. Your honor, I call my first witness, one Zeus of Olympus.”
Thunder crashed in the distance.
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1 comment:
Did you mean crashed in the last sentence?
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